VICTORY: High Park reopens after Rebel News mocks Mayor Tory's cherry blossom lockdown

Flower Power KO’s Tory’s tyranny!

Take a bow, Rebel viewers. We did it!

We collectively embarrassed Toronto Mayor John Tory into finally doing the right thing.

Remember how just a few days ago we visited High Park in Toronto, a High Park that had been cruelly walled off and guarded by the police to prevent people from looking at and smelling the cherry blossom trees?! Gracious, taxpayers might break Wuhan virus protocols and therefore His Worship decided to treat his subjects like kindergarten kids.

We reported that story and channeled Ronald Reagan circa 1987 when I besieged Mayor Tory to “tear down this wall!”

Well, the Mayor must have been humiliated, because on Sunday night, “Checkpoint Cherry” came tumbling down! The wall is gone, and law enforcement personnel are presumably doing real police work now.

But did you know that at the very same time, in Pyongyang, North Korea, citizens are free to take in the sights and smells of their cherry blossom trees? Let that sink in: North Koreans living under Kim Jong-un are enjoying more floral freedom than Torontonians living under Mayor Tory!

But thankfully, Tory did the right thing. And now Hogtown citizens can visit High Park and freely tiptoe through the tulips en route to the formerly forbidden cherry blossom trees. And I must say: it sure smells like freedom to me.

Indeed, to paraphrase the poet Joyce Kilmer:

“I think that I shall never see,
A political retraction as lovely as a tree.”

David Menzies

Mission Specialist

David “The Menzoid” Menzies is the Rebel News "Mission Specialist." The Menzoid is equal parts outrageous and irreverent as he dares to ask the type of questions those in the Media Party would rather not ponder.

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