Two years later, Labatt STILL won't explain the fake pronouns from its Canadian Bud Light cans

We returned to the Labatt London venue where they brew the plonk that is Bud Light. Just tell us what these words mean and we’ll go away, we pleaded.

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Dealing with the dunderheads who operate Anheuser-Busch and its Canadian subsidiary, Labatt Brewing Company, one quickly discovers why this beer behemoth lost billions of dollars in stock value earlier this year as a result of the Dylan Mulvaney fiasco.

Yes, for some bizarre reason, the marketing geniuses decided to use this “transwoman” influencer as their spokesthingy for Bud Light — and then went on to insult their core audience such as frat boys (you know, the people who actually buy Bud Light – or at least, used to).

End-result: when last we checked, Bud Light went from being the number one beer in America somewhere around number 14.

But prior to the Mulvaney marketing catastrophe, Bud Light ventured into the realm of transanity in Canada back in the summer of 2022.

That’s when Labatt premiered Bud Light cans festooned with LGBT-etc. rainbows along with a command to “celebrate everyone’s identity.” (Um, no thanks.)

The cans were also festooned with pronouns and words that might be pronouns. Look, we understand what a she/her and he/him, and a they/them are. But what about the phony baloney pronouns on the cans? What is an XE and an XEM? What’s a SIE and an HIR? And what the devil is a ZE and a ZIR? Indeed, how does one even pronounce these wacky words?

Here's another question: are there even a dozen people in our great dominion who “identity” as a XE, XEM, SIE, HIR, ZE and a ZIR? Have you ever met one? If so, what do they look like?

So it is that we first dropped by the London, Ont.-based Labatt plant for answers back in June 2022. A security guard, via the intercom, promised to pass along our queries to corporate affairs.

A year passed and nobody contacted us. Customer. Service. Excellence.

So it was that last summer we visited the Labatt corporate office in downtown Toronto. Alas, nobody knew what the pronouns were (or how to pronounce these words).

Eventually, the communications person, Veronica Bart, said she’d get back to us. (We think Veronica is a she/her, but who knows, maybe Miss Bart might be a SIE or a ZE or even a ZIR?) Anyway, Bart broke her promise and never did get back to us.

Last week we returned to the Labatt London venue where they brew the plonk that is Bud Light. Just tell us what these words mean and we’ll go away, we pleaded. Alas, not even security would communicate via the intercom. And eventually a nameless man approached us. He gruffly noted that we had to leave the parking lot immediately or the police would be called. Of course!

Bottom line: we still don’t know what a XE, XEM, SIE, HIR, ZE, and a ZIR is. But given the woeful corporate culture at this brewery, we do have a very clear understanding of how the woke-joke stooges employed at this company all but destroyed the Bud Light brand…

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