Unvaccinated in Toronto? Then it’s no zoo for you!

• By Ezra Levant

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On March 1, Ontario Premier Doug Ford decided it was time for the COVID-19 vaccination passport to go the way of the dinosaur. Finally, all Ontarians are equals yet again. Regardless of vax status, all Ontarians can go to cinemas and gyms or movie theatres and arenas without having to produce their “papers.”

Well, not really…

Indeed, we recently decided to visit the Toronto Zoo to check out the various lions and tigers and bears, oh my! After years of being shutout from the joint, we wanted to once again see who’s who in the zoo now that two-tier citizenship and medical apartheid in Ontario is allegedly a thing of the past.

Well, wouldn’t you know it? The corporate zookeepers who run the Toronto Zoo apparently believe they are more knowledgeable when it comes to virology than Ontario’s chief medical officer of health. Which is to say, if you are an unvax’d member of homo sapiens, then it’s no zoo for you in Hogtown.

But why? Initially, we were told by the gatekeepers that “thousands” of zoo animals have died due to COVID-19 during the past two years. That’s very disturbing given that the Toronto Zoo population is about 5,000 animals. But then the people inside the ticket booth clarified that statement: the mortality rate we had been quoted pertained to zoos the world over. So then, how many critters went to the great hereafter at the Toronto Zoo due to the coronavirus? Well, that number rhymes with “hero”… but one can’t be too careful, right?

What makes this exclusionary attendance policy so outrageous is the fact that the Toronto Zoo is owned by the city. How is it some taxpayers are welcomed into the zoo, but others are treated as though they are so many Typhoid Marys? Aren’t all taxpayers equal shareholders?

But the zoo folk have precious little time for debating. Indeed, if you can believe it, security officers were soon summoned. They informed us to beat it – or face trespassing charges! (Keep in mind, we weren’t even in the zoo at this point, just standing upon a common area between the front gates and the parking lot.)

We were told to come back around the end of April. We might be allowed into the zoo then given that April 30th is the target date for vaccinating all the animals. (No, seriously...)

Alas and alack, our visit to the zoo resembled a wild goose chase. Thanks to the pig-headedness of the people running the zoo, this place is hardly the cat’s meow if you are unvax’d. Even though we wouldn’t hurt a fly, the rude reception we received made us mad as hornets bordering on bat-shite crazy. And since we didn’t want to end up being arrested, we had to say, “see you later, alligator.” (OK, that’s enough animal idioms! – Editor.)